Happy Birthday!

I love you so much! And I miss you so much!

Can you see me right now? Best part of the day. Babysitting one wonderful kid and his baby sister. This sweet little angel has refused her crib. At first I thought it’d be uncomfortable sleeping on me and that I’d never get her to sleep. Now, I feel a overwhelming amount of peace. She’s sleeping, your close by, my day has calmed down.

How are you where you are? I hope well and happy! What have you been up to? I must admit, we haven’t talked in a while. I’m sorry. Thanks for sticking with me though.

I’ve had some friends in the past few months join you up there. Tell them I miss them too. Did I ever tell you, you were the best brother a sister could have. Probably too much, as you’d bat me away when I tried to kiss you. I still talk about you all the time. To the new people in my life, telling them how wonderful you were. How you’d take care of me and still do.

Thanks for those nineteen years of siblinghood. Nobody could’ve done it better!


Dear brother

Hi. It’s about five after eleven. Only fifty five minutes more and your birthday would’ve come and gone.

I had an okay day. I slept in, that was nice. Went and did an exchange for yet another car seat that was too small for a client. I just may start making special needs car seats and not charging $1000 dollars for them. Went to a movie with a friend. We saw Snow White and the Huntsman. It was a tad gory as the Queen ate a birds heart in the first scene, yuck. Then I cancelled my evening plans, went home had a nap, made supper and went to bed early. I know I am up now, but it won’t be much longer and I will be sleeping again soon. Have a good night Stephen, I miss you and love you sooooooo much!

The nice thing about my day, is that he was there with me. He also doesn’t mind hearing about it again. I can’t explain the feeling today, but, it feels like something is missing. It also makes me realize how much my world has changed. I miss my world that he was physically a part of. My sadness is deep within me, so deep it is even hard for me to reach. I don’t cry, but I do feel it in my toes and fingers, sad. Maybe sleep will help. Goodnight sweet Stephen.