Birthday nostalgia

June 3rd was my brothers birthday. It may also of been the hardest week of the year for me so far, there’s still plenty of year left. There was a lot going on with work, friends, work, kids, volunteer commitments, life and work. Not having my brother right beside me, to sit quietly with, wrestle with and make things so simple my fears are calmed.

I also, would’ve finished this blog a month ago, because we would’ve written together, it would’ve been about you.

Fourteen years and a month ago we’d be celebrating your birthday. We’d wait for Wheeltrans, the old Welcome bus. Probably at our staple Pizza Hut we do once a year. Enjoying pizza you couldn’t eat and then you’d fall asleep from boredom of watching us. You may or may not wake up for you cake and enjoy the birthday song. It was always hard to surprise you, you were so nonchalant about everything. You enjoyed it anyway as you smile and humor us with the party we gave you, always appreciative.

I’m sad this year. I miss you. It doesn’t get easier, it only changes. You become fainter in my memory, but not in my heart. And time, where…comes and goes.

Well, your birthday will come every year. I should make a point of doing something for myself.

Love you Stephen